Deathbed Confession

When I saw you, I realized I didn’t care.

I realized I didn’t miss you.
I realized I had come to peace that you were going to die without ever changing.
I realized I had accepted, that you chose drinking over me.

Like your mother did to you.

You won’t even make it to seventy.
You are a shell.

I take no blame for that.
You made your decision.
I made sure I gave you what you needed to make a different choice.
And you never did.

That has nothing to do with me.

When you find yourself lying on your deathbed, wondering why your child isn’t by your side.
I hope you realize it was your decision.

All you had to do, was try.
I never asked for perfection.
I never asked you to reach perfect recovery.
I wanted to know I was worth the effort to try.

And I wasn’t.

You get to die with that.

-K.M.
September 2025